This was completely delightful. It is part self-help, some memoir, and some lovely doodles. I love her voice, her non-traditional writing style and her unique and ridiculously specific references. It is a story about how she has managed her anxiety, depression, and ADHD. She has true practical exercises that will help make the reader’s life better. I don’t remember laughing out loud this much at a book in a very long time. Jenny is just hilarious. This book comes with more of a maturity and accountability than from her previous books. She is taking a lot of great experience from therapy and sharing what has worked for her.
My son has severe ADHD and this book really helped me understand more what he goes through daily. I can’t wait to read it again!
Thanks to NetGalley and Viking Penguin for the ARC. Book to be published March 30, 2026.
I have been reading Mary Katherine Backstrom’s substack for a few years now, I found her through her fellow deconstructionist writer Father Nathan Monk, whom she talks about in this latest book. I was fortunate to be allowed to download an advanced listening copy audiobook via NetGalley; thank you to the author and Hachette audio. I am not sure why I was so surprised at MK’s personality and bubbly Southern accent- I knew she was from Alabama and somehow never read her words in a southern accent.
There are a few memoirs and Christian living books in this genre, I really enjoy reading them and it helps me to learn about myself. This book is a lot funnier than I expected, MK has a self-deprecating and simple humor associated with her past time as an evangelical. She has a very mature and questioning attitude about her faith, rejecting rigidity and self-righteousness. Being a mom and having kids that ask great questions really help her make sense of her deconstruction and reconstruction.
This is not written as a linear story and memoir, but focuses on those moments that were monumental in shaping her faith- how her church reacted to find out her stepfather was abusing her, how she reacted when her son asked her if a friend was going to hell, her husband asking for a divorce, and being an ally to the LGBTQ community.
I think sometimes deconstruction stories can be incomplete without the re-construction. MK uses a lovely analogy about a mosaic art of Jesus that was destroyed in a tornado and then painstaking put back together and strengthened. She is honest and contemplative, but not flashy and emotional. This is funny but definitely at a distance. I think she is a great writer and I appreciate when an audiobook memoir is voiced by the author. She has a refreshing humility to approach doubt and faith, and the way those two play with each other.
If you are Gen X and like a good celebrity tell-all, you will want to add this one to your TBR. After all, Ione Skye was everywhere and everything in the late 80’s. And Diane Court and Lloyd Dobler was “where my lore started.”
Ione lists her collaborator, Genevieve Field, in her acknowledgments. Ms Field was a contributing editor at Glamour and her bio says that she does ghost writing. Based on the conversational yet insightful nature of this book, it is clear that she asks great questions and got Ione talking about what made the best material for the book. The memoir starts in her childhood and ends about 20 years ago, when her life became relatively stable. I do think that her experiences in motherhood would be worth reading about, but this book doesn’t really talk about anything past 2005, except very briefly and in summary. Is it a cop-out to write a memoir and not say anything (lol) about the people currently in your life? Maybe. But who cares. I don’t need to hear about her husband of the last 18 years, Ben Lee. I want to know all about Anthony Kiedis and Robert Downey Junior!! And did she ever hook up with John Cusack??? (view spoiler)
I also give credit to Ione’s therapist (whoever they are), because she clearly has done a lot of work around understanding herself and her life. She definitely acknowledges her part in her heartbreak and in her journey. There is a lot of sex, drugs, rock-n-roll, with absent famous fathers and complicated relationships. Say Anything accounts for about 15 pages in the book. Looking back at her life, she takes a lot of responsibility for her mistakes and has a healthy knowledge of what drove her to seek validation through relationships. All without being self-pitying, there are no villains in this story.
It was so interesting to be the “it girl” before the internet. Before TMZ and before paparazzi, etc. It just seems like on any random day she would go to a friend’s house and meet Mick Jagger, River Phoenix or Matthew Perry. A nice jewish girl from the Hollywood hills, she and her brother and mother, who both were successful models, easily were able to make connections and move their careers forward. It seems like it happened almost effortlessly. There was a lot of pain, but bouncing back was easy and assumed. Ione doesn’t need you to like her, and she doesn’t want you to feel sorry for her. It seems like she is finally at a point in her life where she has made peace with her young life and can look back at it with a mature understanding. Ione doesn’t have resentment or anger towards anyone in her life, she has forgiveness both for herself and others. Still, reading with our 2025 eyes there are things that made sense in 1985 that seem creepy or weird now.
Life is long. It has to be so weird to know that most people will always and only remember you as a teenager, right?
A vulnerable and funny look at the inner thoughts and feelings of a blossoming girl. I loved reading this book, which was both funny and touching. I’m not much of a TikTok person, but I became aware of Dylan, her bubbly personality and reluctant activism during “beergate.” This book definitely is true to her voice- a musical theater kid who is both drawn to and repulsed by the spotlight. Although I will never understand the emotional impact of transitioning, let alone so publicly, Dylan sure does try to help me.
She jumps around a bit, from her childhood of dreaming about Broadway, to her early transitioning days, to the fallout of beergate and beyond. I was surprised and heartened to hear about her naïveté and conflict aversion. Dylan seems to see herself as having thin skin, but she is extremely strong. She’d have to be! After reading this fun memoir, I can truly see how she didn’t have an ambition to be as internet-famous as she is, and how she has become an icon. There are complex emotions involved in constantly having to be aware of how others “consume” your appearance. I also appreciated how she acknowledges her privilege in being able to control her transition and what choices she has made.
One change I am going to make after reading this book is that I will actively shame trolls and back up people dealing with hateful comments. I have a tendency to stay away from comments sections, knowing that’s where the trolls feast. But Dylan helped me see how useful it is and how just the small action of being supportive can strengthen us.
Like, if you speak negatively about, say, the weather reporter, and you make negative comments about her appearance, she won’t hear you, but your family will. And even subconsciously they will internalize the believe that if you are visible you are less worthy if you don’t look like you are “supposed to.”
Thanks to NetGalley and Abrams books for the ARC. Book to be published March 11, 2025.
A genuinely sweet and fun to read Hollywood memoir. If you are a Parks and Recreation fan, this is a really nice trip down memory lane. Everyone wants to hear that the actors and show runners of their favorite show were a big family in real life and they all loved each other. That is pretty close to the case here. Jim OHeir has nothing but love for his co-stars and the story that brought him through Parks and Rec to winning an Emmy to now hosting a podcast about it. He fangirls about Henry Winkler and Mary Tyler Moore, he reminisces about the improvised lines and talked about filming and being made a series regular. There are many candid photos shared throughout and lots of first person narratives from Mike Schur and Greg Daniels. I loved hearing the inside scoop on how the show was cast and the business of producing it.
I was lucky enough to get a signed first edition because I pre-ordered from Barnes and Noble. A nice addition to my bookshelf and this would be a great Christmas present for the Parks and Rec fan in your life.
